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3 Ways to "Help Her Buy"

(using the "Best Friend" test....)


Whether you’re selling a product or a service, have you wondered how you can do a better job of selling to women & couples? 

The secret is, instead of “selling” to her, try “helping her buy”.  Sounds easy, but there’s some strategy to it. 

I’m going to introduce you to a great technique I designed called the “Best Friend Test”.  It’s fast and easy to do, and brings a powerful shift in your approach…and your business results.


What’s the Basic Difference between how men and women shop?

When MEN shop, they seem to have one thing on their minds: “How quickly can I get in and out of this store?”.  When WOMEN shop, they have a more thorough process than their male counterparts.  Women tend to place more emphasis on three things:

1) Gathering all the information

2) Evaluating all the options

3) Making a “perfect” decision

It’s not just my idea – Research Shows Men & Women Shop Differently

Retail expert Paco Underhill of Envirosell agrees:

  • men move faster than women through a store’s aisles
  • men spend less time looking than women
  • men don’t like asking where things are, or any other questions
  • 65% of male shoppers who tried something on bought it, as opposed to 25% of female shoppers.

As Paco says "I don't think we'll ever see two men set off on a day of hunting for the perfect bathing suit".

Why do Salespeople Often Lose the Sale with Women?

In my experience, one of the biggest causes of losing sales is that salespeople don’t know how to help women make their purchase decision – especially if the salesperson is male, and is naturally focused on “solving the problem” as quickly as possible.

How Can Salespeople Turn it Around & Gain the Sale?

I truly believe one of the biggest reasons my clients sales jump after working with me, is because I put a BIG emphasis on applying my technique called the “Best Friend Test” to their sales process.


And now, I’m going to introduce the “Best Friend Test” to YOU.  Here’s how it works:

The “Best Friend” Test

Imagine this……your best friend is ill, or out of the country and she is entrusting you to make an important purchase decision on her behalf, while keeping her informed and educated about your choice.   Knowing she could trust you to make the very best decision on her would you approach the decision?

You would be relentless in 1) gathering all the information, 2) evaluating all the options, and 3) making a perfect decision for her, wouldn’t you?

You would take out a blank sheet of paper.  Thinking more as a best friend, than as a salesperson, you start to write. You would list all the steps you must take to make that perfect decision on her behalf. 

1. Help Her Gather Information

You start by thinking of what information you need to gather……What do you need to know about your friends’ needs before you go shopping? (ie: financial advisors…would you really ask her to fill out those risk/return graph questions on those forms?, or would you ask her more about her real-life needs?).  Where you will search for information (websites, consumer journals, and other sources of unbiased recommendations)?  Who will you consult? 

2. Help Her Evaluate Options

Next, you brainstorm about how to evaluate all the options.  You list all the criteria you will consider.  How will you know which of her criteria is most important? How will you get past the “marketing shtick” written in the brochures and get to the truth about the products?  What will you need to know from your best friend in order to choose the option that is perfect for her?

3. Help Her Make a "Perfect" Decision

Now that you’ve gathered all the information, and need to present your best friend with your research and opinion, how will you define the industry jargon to make perfect sense to her, when she is too tired/time pressured to wade through the technical jargon about the product?  How will you make it extremely easy for her to understand why you’ve chosen this option over all the others?

After you finish writing, you start sorting all these questions and lists into cohesive sets.  You may not have all the answers yet, but you start seeing a pattern in how you are going to approach this very important decision for your Best Friend.

NOW YOU.....

So, this is the frame of mind you want to start from, when identifying what information YOU need to offer to your female prospects, to help them buy.  Think of it as helping your BEST FRIEND make a decision.  It’s all about shifting away from “selling”, and toward “helping her buy”, to win her business.

The next time you have an hour or so to brainstorm (an afternoon at a coffee shop? Sunday morning over coffee?), take out a blank sheet of paper and try the exercise above – putting yourself in the Helpful Friend role, but using your own product/service.

Look at all the resources, questions, and criteria you come up with, and consider how to incorporate them into your sales process.  For example, make the information into handouts or informative pages on your website:

  • Q&A handouts
  • Resource lists
  • Industry “Jargon” Glossaries
  • A step-by-step suggestion on the process that clients should go through to make the best purchase decision
  • A list of criteria you suggest clients consider, when choosing a product/service from your industry


Why does the “Best Friend Test” work so well with women prospects?

1) It positions you as the salesperson of choice, because you are demonstrating that you can be trusted to have her best interests in mind.  It shows women that you are partnering with them in gathering all the information, evaluating all the options, and making a perfect decision. 

2) It ensures that you approach the sales process the same way that women are approaching the buying process - in a much more thorough, broader context.  And when you are on her ‘wave-length’, she will respond by partnering as your client.

For a High Heeled Audit to ensure you are using materials that “help her buy”, email me at (newsletter subscribers get 10% off High Heel Audits booked in May!)


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